When you allow your success to depend on your talents, you create strengths. When you allow your success to depend on your non-talents, you create weaknesses.
Quality questions create a quality life. You need to burn this idea into your brain, because it’s as important as anything else you’ll learn in this book. Businesses succeed when those who make the decisions that control their destiny ask the right questions about markets or strategies or product lines. Relationships flourish when people ask the right questions about where potential conflicts exist and how to support each other instead of tearing each other down. Politicians win elections when the questions they raise—whether explicitly or implicitly—provide answers that work for them…
Why do people persist in an unsatisfying relationship, unwilling either to work toward solutions or end it and move on? It’s because they know changing will lead to the unknown, and most people believe that the unknown will be much more painful than what they’re already experiencing.
You’ve got to remember that what drives us is our emotions. So get associated and use pain as your friend, one that can drive you to a new level of success.
The first step is understanding what your strengths are and then focusing on those strengths in what you do in your life.
“Comfort zones are plush-lined coffins.”
All too often, the security of a mediocre present is more comfortable than the adventure of trying to be more in the future.
Achieving goals by themselves will never make us happy in the long term; it’s who you become, as you overcome the obstacles necessary to achieve your goals, that can give you the deepest and most long-lasting sense of fulfillment.
THE PROBLEM-SOLVING QUESTIONS: 1 What is great about this problem? 2 What is not perfect yet? 3 What am I willing to do to make it the way I want it? 4 What am I willing to no longer do in order to make it the way I want it? 5 How can I enjoy the process while I do what is necessary to make it the way I want it?
know that the only limit to what you can have in your life is the size of your imagination and the level of your commitment to making it real.
Goals are a means to an end, not the ultimate purpose of our lives. They are simply a tool to concentrate our focus and move us in a direction.
Remember, as long as you believe something, your brain operates on automatic pilot, filtering any input from the environment and searching for references to validate your belief, regardless of what it is.
“The important thing is not to stop questioning. Curiosity has its own reason for existing. One cannot help but be in awe when he contemplates the mysteries of eternity, of life, of the marvelous structure of reality. It is enough if one tries merely to comprehend a little of this mystery every day. Never lose a holy curiosity,”
We each have over eighty different muscles in our faces, and if these muscles get accustomed to expressing depression, boredom, or frustration, then this habitual muscular pattern literally begins to dictate our states, not to mention our physical character.
One of the most powerful distinctions that I’ve made in the last ten years of my life is simply this: Emotion is created by motion. Everything that we feel is the result of how we use our bodies. Even the most minute changes in our facial expressions or our gestures will shift the way that we’re feeling in any moment, and therefore the way we evaluate our lives—the way we think and the way we act.
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